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           I find it interesting that when God tries to tell me something, He does it in many ways, over and over again, until I finally catch on. Lately I have been challenged about the different areas of sin in my.


 In church last week the message was about opening all parts of your life to God. Even the vaulted parts of our lives. By vaulted, I mean the parts that we keep hidden from everyone, including God. The parts that we are so ashamed of, so afraid of that we are unwilling to share them with anyone. This had me thinking…. What are the parts of my life that are vaulted?

It just so happened that the same week the verse I was supposed to memorize with my sister came from I John 1:5-7

Walking in the light

 
5This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.
6If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth.
7But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[
a
]
sin.

I John 1:5-7

 

I don’t claim to be perfect by any means and I am admittedly and ashamedly a sinner. Yet, I had the feeling God was trying to tell me there was more than what I was aware of and I was having a hard time pin pointing the areas of darkness in my life. So, I prayed that God would open my eyes. Part of me really did not want my eyes to be opened to what was wrong in my life, but I want nothing keeping me from growing closer to God. I knew I had no choice.

Sure enough, God answered my prayer. Something happened and it suddenly became very clear what one area of my life that had been vaulted for years was. This part sucked… I was stricken with guilt and shame. When I was able, I put it all in God’s hands. Even though I knew He had forgiven me and would give me the strength to change, I could not forgive myself. I shared all of this with a trusted friend. Over time talking with God I came to realize that He doesn’t want my living in shame. He wants me to enjoy life, to be aware of my sin, but not to let it control me.

I really do feel better now that I have dealt with all of this. I know that there are more areas of darkness in my life, and I am ready to take them head on. One at a time, of course….

4 responses to “Walking in the light”

  1. Wow, that is really good disipline and control, the way you are able to let God into all of the areas of your life, I am working on that myself.

    See ya in a month!

  2. It is awsome to read your comments and realize that you are not my baby girl anymore. You are a mature Christian with deep thoughts and insights.
    I never tire of talking about my awesome God. I am really looking forward to hearing about your God sightings as you follow Him. I hope you will let me meet experience the culture and the people with you through this blog site. Love Mom

  3. That is so cool! We all have those things
    that we like to push in the closet and
    pretend they are not there. But, as some
    point we have to deal with them. Just
    remember, HE is there to help us through
    these things, even though it is difficult.